Dating First Impressions: A Man’s View

first impression Dating First Impressions: A Mans View

Time for some tough love. Like it or not girls, a man is always judging you based on how you look, how you act, how you carry yourself, how your dressed, if you smile, if your too tall, if your to fat, to old, or if your wow just right. Like the old saying goes, “you don’t get a second chance to make a first impression”.  Now is this fair or is it right? It does not matter, it is what it is. I know your saying,  a real man should  love you for you and not the way you look. What if something happened to you, what if you got hurt and your physical appearance changed, or what happens when you age? Under this logic will he eventaully leave you right?

No, and your missing the point. Love is loyalty to a man. A real man will be very loyal to you no matter what once he falls in love with you. For men,  first comes the physical attraction which in large part is based the first impression you make, is why it is very important to not screw it up.  Then follows the period of  time to get to know each other, upon which, if your the right girl for him, he will love and appreciate  you for you: like your hopes and dreams, your ambitions, family values and all the more important deeper things that make simply dating someone into having a relationship with someone. I once remember a telling quote from Donald Trump’s then girlfriend model Melania Knauss when asked, “can’t it be said that you wouldn’t be dating Donald if he wasn’t rich” upon which she replied

and can’t it be said that he would not be dating me if I was not so beautiful?

Smart woman. It is true that her being a model obviously helps, and him being a billionaire helps, but I suspect Melania likes Trump for his power and ambition more than his money, his money is just a by product of his ambition, and he chooses to be with her because not only is she a model, but that she is smart and has her own life and career independent of Donald Trump. If she had too, she could make it on her own just fine, and Trump knows and respects that, as would any man.

First impressions are critical for guys, they help the guy determine in his mind weather or not he will approach you. Lets blast through some images now to show some examples and get some constructive feedback:

hot party girl

A hot blond party girl

IMPRESSION: The boobs, the orange skin, the fakish blond hair with colored streaks. This is physically attractive to guys. Most guys (if not all) would look at this and think wow she is sexy/hot. But news flash, just because a guy thinks your sexy and wants to sleep with you, does not mean he think “wow I want to date you”, and of course you want a man to find you attractive, but should also want him to be genuinely interested in you. You want: “Wow who is that”? NOT  “wow shes hot”.

Secondly, she comes off as a hot party girl. The type a man may not think to take home to mom. She is more the kind of girl that guys would be proud to let other guys know their going to bed with, but not exactly the type they could see a long term relationship with (at first though, remember, this is just first impressions). Also, other men will look at this type, and think she is picky and does not take a genuine interest in new and different guys. Meaning that “if your not 6ft 2 with black hair and dark skin I’m not talking to you”. I would look at her and think If I don’t look like this guy:

douchebag tough guy

Then I have no shot at getting with her. Why waste my time being rejected, Ill will just focus on someone else that I think I have a shot with and NOT approach this girl. Also, the girl in the above pic has a similar style to the hot blond party girl pic we started with.  That is where that train of though comes from.

cute natural girl
A cute natual looking girl

 

IMPRESSION:She is an adorable, cute, natural  looking girl. The hair and makeup are not to much and she comes off as very approachable. Most men if they found her attractive, would make no hesitation to approach her and strike up a conversation to find out more about her. She has a nice mix of sex appeal and girl next  doorness. Her cuteness makes her sexy, and that is not found by being her being revealing, it comes from her being feminine. This girl has got it going on.  
 

The Beautiful European Girl
The Beautiful European Bobshell

 IMPRESSION: Her looks are a bit intimidating actually for many men. She is so pretty, so perfect looking,  she is a lot like a  mans fantasy. Best advice for her would be to come off as a normal person, not a fantasy, someone who lives and works like everyone else. Cute is nice, but girls want to be sexy, so what is sexy? She is sexy. For a girl sexy = feminine, and this is it. The hair and makeup mixed with the tight pants and heels. Creative use of jewelry, perfect complexion, in shape, not to revealing. Perfection. She is a head turner, though many men would think that their not in her league and wimp out in approaching her, but those that have confidence in themselves, the type that are actually worth any woman’s time will have no problem trying to discover what is going on here.

 

 

Ms I don't Care
Ms I don’t Care

 IMPRESSION: She, I would say has a niche look. Some men out their will find her attractive, but for most her appearance is off putting, and her shirt is not particularly pleasant either. She does come off as confident in her appearance, shes seems to have an, “this is me, get over it” attitude which is attractive actually, but the fact that she does not view her weight (based on her shirt) as an issue is bothersome. Does she not work out, does she not value being healthy? What kind of lifestyle is she into? Does she drink too much? Smoke too much? Is she into drugs?On and on we can. Being overweight is no good, for men or women. Women can have more body issues than men, since girls value  status such as success and ambition in men more than men do in women,  and guys value youth and beauty in girls more than girls do in men. Stereotypes of body’s like the “European bombshell” girl (above) is what is considered ideal because thin is the opposite of fat. However as long as your healthy for your body type that is what is important. For example check her out, guys would not consider her “fat” but rather “full figured” and she is very beautiful even though she is not model skinny: 

full figured body

LAST WORD:

For a man, there is a difference between being romantically interested in, and being attracted to

A guy could very well be interested in you, but that does not mean he is automatically romantically interested in you. Most guys do in fact want to sleep with you. The best way to weed out the guys that justwant to sleep with you, from those that want to sleep with you but get to know you is to institute a two 5 week rule. That means no sex of any kind with a new guy for 5 weeks. Make out, get touch feely, but no taking clothes off. If he sticks around after 5 months, he more than likely, like you for you. On top of wanting to sleep with you.

Rob Pattinson from GQ

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