Help! Get my EX back please, thanks

how to get your ex back

You broke up. SO you want to know how to get your ex back? Well grab something to drink and do a little reading because I am about to tell you. First off, its more complicated and we need to break down the different types of breakups. Who did the break up and what were the circumstances around the destruction of your relationship. It should be clear, dating a guy is different from dating a girl, and dating a girl is different from dating a guy. First off lets go over some basic things for both sexes.

Keep contact directly after the break up to a minimum

Breaking up sucks, it is emotional and both of you are not in a clear state of mind. When someone is your ex, let them be your ex for a while so you can collect your thoughts and think more rationally about what happened. Take one of my friends, lets call him James (its not James btw). James is a decent guy, dated this girl for over a year, was never really sure about his feelings for his girl. His girl though, was in love with James. The two were going about there relationship nicely, until his girlfriend bought a condo and asked James to move in. James hesitated. Thoughts ran through his head :

Living Together: Engagement: Marriage: Rest of his life: A Very Unhappy James

So James, instead of being a man and breaking it off with his girlfriend,  made up excuses as to why he wouldn’t move in. Frustrated with James, not simply over this issue, but also a culmination of reasons. Which can  basically be summed up as James inability to be the man she wants, because he never really wanted to be her man in the first place. Went out with two guys she just meet at the condo complex she just moved into. Two guys Jame never meet. Can you guess what happened? Yep she cheated on James. Relationship over.

Now, James never even wanted to date her really, but now he is all messed up in the head, wanting to know how to get your ex back. The moral of the story is that you need time apart from one another. Sure they may start dating someone else, but usually rebound relationships are full of problems. Spending time apart is the best way to ensure you get your ex back. Take a few months, don’t call, don’t text, don’t ANYTHING. This is what I told my friend James. Time apart allowed him to clear his head, and realize that he never wanted to be with her in the first place. He was just being emotional. Next Up:

Be strong!

If you want to know how to get your ex back, you need to stay apart for a bit of time. Be strong, do not contact the other person. Being emotional, or need is extremely unattractive, and a bit embarrassing when you realize from a rational perspective of how you are acting. The crying, the SURPRISE I randomly bought you flowers,  the  I miss you don’t you care about me crap anymore crap, won’t work. This is why time apart helps, get yourself collected so If you do decide, you can set a plan of attack which well get into a bit. But perhaps you will be like James and come to your senses.

Spend time with friends, be happy hopefully

Look you can’t control your emotions but you can control your actions. If you take positive steps to be happy even if your feeling miserable, will eventually result in happiness. Happiness will result in you becoming attractive again, and by this, it is time to self reflect. When your out with your friends, or doing whatever give you happiness. What is it that people like about you? Once you know that, you will start to remember why your ex dated you in the first place. With that knowledge you now know how to attract him/her again.

get your ex back

The Breakups

The answer to the question of how to get your ex back depends largely on two points 1) Doing the self help describe above and 2) the type of break up it was. 2 is actually more important that 1 so listen up. It depends on who broke up with who and why. Not all breakups are created equal,  but the basics around why a relationship ended are pretty consistent.

She broke up with you for whatever reason but she did not cheat.

You have a chance of getting your ex back and having a good relationship again. Just follow the steps. Once you break up, break off contact for a month or two. Spend time with friends and family, do things that interest you, and try to make yourself happy. If after a few months your still missing your ex, then its time to get her back. First off, why did you break up? Did she leave you because of the way you acted or the things you said? There were inherent problems that caused the relationship to fall apart. You need to ask yourself what those problems where. I can’t help you with that. Once you know the issues, you need to fix those issues. Time apart then getting back together is not going to fix inherent problems. You are just setting yourself up for another break up. This takes work and personal development.  Fix the issues, if it was you that was the issue. Next, be aggressive but not too aggressive. Do little things like compliment her, or call to talk to her, send her nice emails. It is the little stuff that will keep you in the running. Don’t give up until the race is over!

What if she is dating someone? Well “how to get your ex back” is not a guarantee, that’s why you should value any relationship your in before you get into this mess.  If she is dating someone, then respect her new relationship. Make it known that you still have feeling for her. Be a man and a gentleman about it. Take her out for lunch. Just talk to her. Ask her how she is and what she has been up to. Let her know how you feel and tell her to just think about what you said. DO NOT get emotional. DO NOT cry or beg. Be strong (remember) and tell her you miss her and would like to get to know her again. That you love her (if that’s the case). Then, it’s up to her. She knows how you feel so no need to be a stalker.

She cheated broke up with him/ you broke up with her

Does not matter who broke up with who. Your relationship is over. How to get your ex back? You don’t. Typically when a girl cheats, it much more of am emotional betrayal. They tend to sleep with someone to get what there not getting from you. When a guy cheats, it just physical no emotion generally speaking. So if a girl cheats on you, its over. You will never truly forgive her, and the relationship is permanently different for the worse. There is no sense of trust, and their is no loyalty. Don’t waste anymore of your time searching the Internets for how to get your ex back. Move on.

He Cheated, you broke up with him

Guys cheat for physical reasons unless there absolutely in love. If your dating a guy and he cheats, it is not because he does not care about you, he does. He just doesn’t love you. Love is powerful stuff, it makes men do crazy things, but cheating is not one of them. Men cheat for the physical pleasure and the excitement of being with someone new. If you broke it off with him, but are now reconsidering that decision. Good news, you have a good chance of getting him back since you had the power to end it. Just start flirting with him again, act like you did when you first meet. Guys are simple. That’s all you need to do. Be careful though. He will probably cheat on you again and again, unless he falls in love with you.

He cheated, he broke up with you

Just like for the girl who cheated, this guy is a dirt bag. He cheated and he broke it off . You just want what you can’t have. Move on, a guy like this is just not that into you. He was never that into you. He just wanted sex, or temporary companionship. Don’t play the fool. Be mad as hell and get revenge, stop searching for how to get your ex back and start searching for how to get revenge on a cheating boyfriend.

So hopefully I covered how to get your ex back well enough. Dating is no picnic these days. Manners are missing and expectations on both sides can be quite unreasonable. Getting an ex back is no easy task and is not even guaranteed; but there are things you can do. Hopefully this culturally relevant, irreverent dating site will help you with what you need to do; and that’s just how it is.

SHARING IS CAREING:
  • Print
  • Digg
  • del.icio.us
  • Facebook
  • Google Bookmarks
  • Reddit
  • StumbleUpon
  • Technorati
  • Twitter
  • Yahoo! Buzz
  • email

Add a Comment